The closest part of your social circle is your friends. Your friends is the family you have chosen.
If you don’t have friends then man, find some.
Friends are essential for our lives as people are social creatures.
We need friends because we can’t just live alone and we need friends to have our backs in good and bad times.
Our friends teach us things we maybe didn’t know or haven’t experienced and we do too.
We can learn things from our friends and they can learn things from us no matter the age.
I have some close friends and some of them are in my age, some are younger and some are older. The age doesn’t matter if the mind is wise enough.
My friends are in the age of 18 to 30+. I give and I take thoughts, experiences and information.
Around your age: You can learn stuff from them (and they from you) in a medium degree as you get older together and you may experience similar things at a similar period of time. It is a great feeling to know that you have a friend growing up together doing things and help each other get through some situations. You grow up making long-time friends and that is worthwhile.
Younger than you (3-5 years or more): You can teach those friends stuff in a great degree as you are 3 or more years older and you have probably experienced things they haven’t yet. You can advise beforehand them about dos and don’ts that you think are important or whatever they ask you about, but you can also let them get through things alone and then express your opinion and this way help them become stronger. Also, you can learn from them about many things you are maybe too old to know (ex. about tech info) and also learn how to express your thoughts to others and be helpful to them and feel fulfilled.
Older than you (3-5 years or more): If you are younger than your friends 3-5 or more years then the above paragraph serves you conversely.
So don’t care too much about the age. If you match it’s all good.
Where to find friends:
- The key to find friends is to go outside and live your life.
Meet everybody and the friendship with somebody will happen.
Try to be engaging and happy and not grumpy or shy. Be bold because grumpy and shy people mosto of the time stay alone.
I used to see kids at school, college and at the gym who were alone, trying not to catch eyes with you and wouldn’t greet you or even ask you about some machines at the gym because they were very shy.
Also, those people were most of the time bored and grumpy because they had noone to talk with.
The point is to face your social life fears, shy or not.
Be engaging and meet people.
If you are older than a student and you have no friends there is hope for you too.
You can meet people at your workplace, people that maybe you had ignored before.
Greet everybody every day with a good morning or evening and a big smile. You will automatically feel better and meet people at the same time.
When you get comfortable with people around you ask them to grab a cup of coffee at the break or grab a beer after work.
You will meet many kinds of people and that’s why you should be careful and selective but not capricious and snub.
By hanging out with people it is natural that you will match with somebody.
This method applies to everyone but in case you work online from home you can also meet friends.
There you will probably meet people with similar beliefs, interests and hobbies you can be friends with.
As always be bold enough to talk to people, get comfortable and hang out with them. I know it’s not easy, at first, but you will get more and more comfortable as days go by.
There is also another way to meet people that I did not have to try yet (except from women and that’s another story), which is to meet people online.
I haven’t done it personally, but I see that it is surely happening.
If you would like to try this way out, you could meet people online from websites you like to visit by commenting on articles or forums and they might be people like you that have a similar way of thinking.
But there are two big problems:
#1 Distance. The people you might meet online may be staying somewhere far from your town. It’s not impossible to meet, but it would be expensive and time consuming.
#2 You can’t really know who is behind his PC monitor. Even if his/her profile indicates some info for him/her you can’t really know if it’s true and the best and safest way to meet these kind of people is to arrange a meeting somewhere in public.
Why you have to pick the right friends.
This is the hard part. You can easily meet people but you have to make a good research to find the right ones.
A friend will help you rise or will drag you down. From my experience the most of the people that you will meet will probably drag you down.
The wise are a few and you have to search for them. Meet many people and hang out with who you think you could match.
Then, after some period of time you will understand who is/are the right.
Pythagoras said: “From all the others you shall make friend the one who is the best of all the virtuous.”
If you make friend the one who Pythagoras said, you will surely rise along with him because two wise and smart brains (or more) make a great combination with great outcomes and two brains are better than one (possibilities for corporate partnership).
Mistakes I’ve done with people.
- I opened myself too early.
- I considered friends people I knew a little period of time. I also thought they felt the same.
- I had expectations from them because I was giving more.
- I was stupid enough to hang-out with people I knew they were the wrong people and of course they betrayed me.
- I thought the majority of people were good and grateful
Who is a good friend?
In my opinion:
- A good friend is a friend that wants to help you through things in the bad and the good times and is always there for you.
- A good friend also help you make the right choices and is not jealous of you even you do greater than him on something.
- A good friend wants to become a better person, receive good-will critic and give good-will critic back.
- A good friend gives you advice he thinks suit you and could help you in your life.
- A good friend wants to teach you and also learn from you.
- A good friend understands.
You are not perfect and they are not perfect. But you can help each other become better persons by discussing with goodwill and see what you can do.
Talk with people, make the greatest friends, enjoy life.