We are all humans and we all have flaws but we also have the capacity to change.
If we want to.
The matter of changing parts of our characters is a very thin one because as we are ourselves, we can’t easily understand what we are doing “wrong”. Of course nobody knows ourselves better than us, but in many cases somebody else (a trusted close friend) may have to tell us.
But how can you know if you really do have some downsides?
That’s the real deal.
It is not easy to understand and comprehend whether there’s something “wrong” about you.
In fact there is nothing wrong, there is potential of evolution.
And this article is all about understanding yourself, being yourself and changing yourself.
Downsides of your personality
Do you sometimes freak out so badly that you start yelling and swearing without control of yourself?
Do you feel bored all the time?
Do you hate working?
Do you think you are not going anywhere in life?
Do you have 0 friends?
Do you make 0 money?
Do you dream of something and keep dreaming and dreaming?
Do you feel anxious when it’s time for bed and when you wake up?
Those 10 examples above indicate that if you feel familiar with at least one of them you may have some problems with your attitude in life.
Maybe you are familiar with at least one of the above. Maybe you have someone close to you that keeps telling you that you do one of the above.
These are the things I’m talking about.
I’ve been on the road of improving myself two years now.
I see things now that I wouldn’t see two years before. I see that I was a little close person keeping distance from some people around me, that obviously aren’t perfect, but who is?
I see that I had been putting labels on people and situations. People that listen to a particular genre of music I didn’t like, people that have a style I didn’t like, people that have beliefs I didn’t like, people of different lifestyle I didn’t like.
I also put labels on situations I didn’t like, like going to clubs or to some particular places I didn’t like.
All these for what? For nothing. That was not a good mindset.
After some friends ,that have been on the same road of improving, told me about some websites they found on the internet, then was the time that I saw myself and the world around me in a different perspective.
With those friends we helped each other on improving ourselves. We would do a good-intention critic to each other and that way along with on the self-improvement whole thing we found some weak points in our personal characteristics and attitudes.
The thing is to have an open mind, good intention and trust yourself and your friends.
Accept who you are
The next step is to accept who you are.
You are who you are and I am who I am. You are different I am different everyone is different.
You and me will always live our own way and that is what makes us different, we will never change that as there isn’t something wrong about it. It’s just our choices, our perspective, our own way.
You can’t really change your core. No one can. Our soul is what makes us different. You can’t change that. You can only change what orbits around/surrounds it.
Accept your strong and your weak points.
As people we evolve. It will be either to something better or to something worse. It is your choice.
But if you want to evolve into something better don’t be stupid and accept that you have some downsides.
Remember, nobody is perfect but the people who get a step further are the ones who want to evolve into something better.
So, we’re getting in the next step.
Be willing to evolve into a better person – The process
You have to be willing to strengthen your weak points (procrastination, boredom, lack of skills, lack of creativity, lack of power, lack of knowledge, weak mindset, bad physique, harmful habits, etc.) and to strengthen even more your strong points.
If you want to change you will have to invest your time efficiently.
What I did (and still do):
My No.1 priority is to write on my blog. But to get to this point I had to firstly invest my time on expanding my knowledge about things by reading articles and books, watching videos on YouTube, listening to Podcasts, then applying what I’ve learnt in my life and then deciding on my own what I believe that works or not.
You have maybe heard about mentors, but I wasn’t lucky enough to have one in person until October 2015.
If we consider as mentors people that I read online then fine. But 5 months now I have in person kind-of-mentors that are my friends. They are 8+ years older and have experienced things that I haven’t, so I get advice from them about things I want an extra point of view or experience.
The thing is that not everybody has a mentor(s). But everybody has internet connection. So there is no excuse on where to find quality material.
Many people say that they best way to learn is by practicing. I believe in that too, but I also believe in reading material from other people.
By reading stuff and watching videos (again, from trusted sources of course) you have more options on what to practice in your life as you may find some things that you haven’t thought about.
The thing is that not all the information out there is valuable and you’ll have to find some trusted sources.
Remember: don’t just be a material consumer and a couch potato. Go out and live your life and alongside read some stuff. You will find solutions to your problems and you will see what works best for you.
Nobody wants to know that he has some downsides. Be the one who does.
Know, learn, apply, evolve.
PS: Finally I’ve made a Twitter profile, hit the follow button.